Waking up to the power within
My life has taken so many turns in the shortest amount of time that I don’t even know where to start.
There was a moment in 2018 where I woke up with an intense desire for more.
Something had shifted within myself.
And I hear you all say “Can you just wake up as a different person?” I say: “Yes, you can.”
Can you comprehend the confusion I went through in the beginning? I felt like I was dying on many levels. I could not concentrate on anything. If you would ask me now what I was up to: I can not tell. Life was a blur. I remember I was living, working and socializing but I was questioning everything.
“Why can’t I just be happy?”
“Why can’t I just do live like everyone else?”
I felt disconnected from everything what was “normal”. A deep sadness consumed me over the conditioning I have been taught my entire life. This was more than a depression. My soul literally felt broken. The desire to embark on a new life path with more meaning and purpose became unbearable.
In my darkest moments I was scared this feeling will last forever. I would never recover from the heaviness of the world. It felt like I carried it all. Later that year I was diagnosed with cancer and the recovery process brought even deeper and older wounds to the surface.
That year has truly changed me forever. For the first time I saw unhealthy relationship patterns, lack of boundaries and co-dependency. I was terrified because I realized I was engaging in them too. I felt disconnected from most people. There was no logical explanation to the meaning to all of this. I became incredibly sensitive to energies. To an extend that was far beyond what society tells us is normal. Later on this sensitivity brought me across my Reiki Trainings.
I was awakening spiritually and it was ironic because I never saw myself as an overly spiritual person. Feeling lost and alone I started my healing journey. I became aware of my internal guidance and how to connect and listen to it, which led me across Breathwork.
In the beginning of 2019 - just before I came to Bali and started engaging in many different alternative healing modalities - I lost my job in Amsterdam. At that stage on my journey I already was aware I had a purpose which included helping other people.
I was just confused on how I was supposed to transit into such a role.
That’s when the universe came in. This is what I call divine intervention.
The cut off from work came with a lot of fear and insecurities.
I didn’t notice that I started identifying with my work.
“Who am I?” I thought.
“You can be anything”, was the answer.
And that moment everything shifted.
“I can be anything!” I realized. A burden was lifted. My emotions moved from agony and shame into ecstatic joy and excitement. One week later I landed in Bali and never looked back.
From the very first session Breathwork has changed my life.
I was able to release old stuck emotions. The moment I acknowledged them and felt them I experienced a huge breakthrough. My heart burst open.
Up until now my story might sound dark, but there was a meaning behind all of this. As I traveled from heavy places into the lightness of being I realized I wanted to help others to do the same. I had the most vivid and radiant vision of my life.
I saw myself facilitating. I saw the souls I was guiding who went through the same transformation as I did. “You are so needed” echoed in my head. I cried for hours. It felt incredibly freeing to give space to all my emotions. To let them move through me without attachment, without judgement.
The breath is the bridge between your physical body and your soul. It is a highway into the subconscious and accelerates your journey back to your true authentic self. Back to your essence.
I am able to hold space at an extraordinary level because I have been diving to the very depth of my shadow self. The persona we are constantly trying to hide and ignore.
And I promise you: there is nothing to fear and everything to gain. This is the most beautiful and empowering message. Knowing that all healing powers are already contained within yourself. You only need the breath to access it.
Sharing my story with love and hope it empowers & inspires you. The world needs you.